I've been sick for the last few days. So nothing much happened. The only notable thing is that on Friday I went Speed Dating. Ooh. It was supposed to be a 10:10 somewhere in Beverly Hills. But they lost the venue, moved the thing to West Hollywood. Then one of the women dropped out and so did her 4 friends. So the ratio was 2:1. I got there a little early because I didn't want to be late. The host apologized and said I'll get a code to go to another event for free.
When I got there I went straight for the bar. I talked to one of the other guys who was waiting. Another broken heart trying to go out there. I told him I didn't want to look out. He did. He said he didn't see anyone he was remotely interested in talking to. I got the same vibe. Either way, I asked him why he's even there then. So he finished his drink and left. Good lad. I was considering leaving, too, but I was a few blocks away from Anotio's where I could meet Alex L after.
The actual 1:1s with girls were extended to 7 minutes instead of 5. Plenty of time to get to know someone on surface level. Lots of smiling, pleasant faces. That part was good. I learned that nobody goes to these things alone. Every girl brought a friend. Or rather, every girl got brought by a friend. There was a clear distinction between those who needed to get out more and those who could manipulate their friends to go out with them. This one girl literally said she's doing charity work by bringing her friend out when I asked her what she was doing there. Ha.
So I met two teachers and two nurses. The last lady was crazy. This slimy unpleasant person. She was at least 50 in a 24-35 speed dating event and she's already had a few too many drinks. She either kept getting offended or talking out of her ass about some bullcrap topic she knows nothing about. When she started insisting that I get a drink with her I mentioned that she's probably already had enough and she started yelling "This guy doesn't think women shouldn't drink". The host kept apologizing to me for her behavior. It was kind of funny at first, but after more comments like that I just left.
At Antonio's Alex and I had a couple of drink. I figured out he's lost a lot of his Russian. Ha. And I called it a night.
Saturday I was sick. I mustered up enough strength to go to Tempest, but that's about it.
Sunday I was sick, but I mustered enough strength to go to the beach and give Hope a ride from the airport doing movies and a hike on the way.
Today I'm sick, but I think I'll go to work anyway. It really does always feel like there's too much work to do on my team.
Monday, July 11, 2016
Thursday, July 7, 2016
New Team
Yesterday was my first day on the new team. Nothing amazing has happened. Nothing bad either. I found out that they have a lot of things together that I didn't know they did. Like they have a lot of process in place. It's probably a little stunting, but right now it's a good thing since I have structure! Finally.
I was invited to lunch 5 different times today. Haha. What a good-wishing team. I ended up going, but too late after everyone finished. Hehe. Then had a 1:1 with the manager and went to work. I had a goal for myself to get something done. But at the end of the day I was nowhere near started. Lots of documentation to read.
There was a Plain White T's concert that Chris and Alina wanted to go to to. I was thinking about making it out, but it would've taken an hour and I didn't feel like sitting in traffic. I needed to go to the gym anyway to pick up my gym bag.
At the gym I did a move before warming up and pulled a muscle in my back. It still hurts. I'm not sure how to fix it. So the rest of the session wasn't as productive. I still did things though. Olga brought the exercise sheets again so we did some trampoline drills.
Another thing that happened yesterday was that I had some closure talks with Katya (from San Clemente). She said she's upset with me for still going on OkC and not expressing a lot of interest in her. I told her that she needs to tell people if she expects something from them. At the end I asked what it is that she'd want from me. And she sent me a video of waves crashing on the beach. I think I'm supposed to do an interpretive dance or something. I give up. I don't know how to communicate with people like that.
I was invited to lunch 5 different times today. Haha. What a good-wishing team. I ended up going, but too late after everyone finished. Hehe. Then had a 1:1 with the manager and went to work. I had a goal for myself to get something done. But at the end of the day I was nowhere near started. Lots of documentation to read.
There was a Plain White T's concert that Chris and Alina wanted to go to to. I was thinking about making it out, but it would've taken an hour and I didn't feel like sitting in traffic. I needed to go to the gym anyway to pick up my gym bag.
At the gym I did a move before warming up and pulled a muscle in my back. It still hurts. I'm not sure how to fix it. So the rest of the session wasn't as productive. I still did things though. Olga brought the exercise sheets again so we did some trampoline drills.
Another thing that happened yesterday was that I had some closure talks with Katya (from San Clemente). She said she's upset with me for still going on OkC and not expressing a lot of interest in her. I told her that she needs to tell people if she expects something from them. At the end I asked what it is that she'd want from me. And she sent me a video of waves crashing on the beach. I think I'm supposed to do an interpretive dance or something. I give up. I don't know how to communicate with people like that.
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
Last vacation day.
Sadly my 6-day weekend has come to an end. And what did I do with it? I hung out with my niece. We went to get Which-wich. She wanted to go to LA zoo, but I knew better than suffer in traffic and heat, so I took her to Malibu instead. We sat on the rocks and watched waves crash on the giant rocks. We picked up some bottoms some arseholes left behind themselves and threw them away. Then we drove (thought could've walked) to the self-realization shrine. So calm and peaceful. Saw a duck with so many ducklings. Always so cute to watch animals. Then we drove West on Sunset and decided to go bowl. After bowling we went to the movies and saw Swiss Army Man. What the hell did we see?!? We concluded the day by going to the Grove and having tea.
After I took my niece home I drove to Tempest and put in a work-out. I still felt pretty social so Andrea, Lonnie and I went to get food after. I got home late. I woke up in the middle of the night unable to sleep. I'd forgotten my gym bag at Tempest and I'm really worried something will happen to my stuff. Given that everything in it is pretty new, rebought after the car break-in, I would be devastated if I lost it all again. :(
I had a dream where I was playing Frankenstein in a cheap play and there were many girls surrounding me wanting to stay in touch after. Ah, the romantic life for an artist. I tried finding them (a particular one, again), but failed and woke up. Story of my life.
I start on my new team today. I'm not ready. Ill never be ready. The only thing left to do is to get out of bed and face the day.
After I took my niece home I drove to Tempest and put in a work-out. I still felt pretty social so Andrea, Lonnie and I went to get food after. I got home late. I woke up in the middle of the night unable to sleep. I'd forgotten my gym bag at Tempest and I'm really worried something will happen to my stuff. Given that everything in it is pretty new, rebought after the car break-in, I would be devastated if I lost it all again. :(
I had a dream where I was playing Frankenstein in a cheap play and there were many girls surrounding me wanting to stay in touch after. Ah, the romantic life for an artist. I tried finding them (a particular one, again), but failed and woke up. Story of my life.
I start on my new team today. I'm not ready. Ill never be ready. The only thing left to do is to get out of bed and face the day.
Tuesday, July 5, 2016
Independence Day weekend
It's late, again. It seems my life is never at that good steady state where I have things to do and I do them and yet have time to write about it for perfect chronicles of my existence. I'm perpetually stuck in a cycle of too busy experiencing something to take 30 minutes to write it down and not doing anything of importance that I want to preserve the memory anyway.
Thursday we got on a bus which took us to Las Vegas. Jake was my bus buddy. In Vegas we did a photo scavenger hunt. Then we stuck around for the "Open Bar" that turned out to only serve bad beer and bad wine. I have had it. I walked out. I went looking for tickets for a show but couldn't find anything. So I got a small bottle of Russian Water and drank it. I went back to the party that was now largely depleted and had another 4 glasses of wine. Then I had silly conversations with people and followed a group of coworkers to a club. I wore comfy clothes for a change. I may still be able to do flips and tricks in a collared shirt, but I can't jump well in my usual pants. So I wore my parkour pants. Well turned out they don't like what I was wearing at the fancy-pants club. I wasn't let in. I went back to the hotel room and drunk called the girl I've been dating. She said some unusual things that I was in no mental state to fully discuss, especially over the phone.
The next day I spent running around going to shows. Saw Tarzan the movie, Popovich the act, Recycled Percussion the musicians, Sin City comedy cabaret, and the cherry on top was the Absinthe performance, which was, you guessed it, amazing. Chris and Alina made it to Vegas that night and we concluded the day by going up the Stratosphere tower.
Almost forgot. I won in roulette. Made 2 bets of $3 and won $19. Then later bet $3 and won $39. Yeah. Good luck!
Anyway, the next day we walked around got food etc. I played roulette again, but with less luck this time. I lost $25. Then won $20. Then lost $40 and then lost $15. Overall, it's been negative, but ultimately fun. We went to two magic shows. We saw Mat Franco and Pen&Teller. Pen and Teller were amazing, just like I thought they would be. I wish we'd had the time to take photos with them. Alas, we needed to make the drive back.
I woke up at a normal time the next day despite everything. Sunday it was. I went to the beach. This time I spent a good amount of time there. I got water. Did things in moderation. Then... it was almost late. It was Heather's last day in LA. People were going to play board games at a bar and then go over to Colin C's place. I didn't want to go to the bar. I was getting sad, too. That happens, still for all the same reasons. So I went home and crashed.
I woke up around 20:30 and had this desire to go do something. I decided to have a conversation with the girl, but I wanted to have it in person. She lives far away so I suggested I come over. She said she sees why she'd say that because she's under the impression I don't want to come after. I was confused. But I did explain that yes, she's right, I did have plans for the 4th. But.... she told me to not bother and just spend time with other people. 0.o I didn't need more than that. I'm looking for a woman who will say "Fuck yes! Come over!". She wasn't the one and that was the end of that. Have to be honest, it bummed me out a little. Life goes on though. I signed up for speed dating and RSVP'd for board games at Colin's. He didn't reply that night. Well, that was disappointing.
I started today by wanting to make things different in any way that I could. I went on a hike. Did the Los Liones trail in 30 minutes again. Showered. Went for lunch with family. Washed my car. Told my family I wasn't coming to picnic/fireworks after. Decided to not go to the lagoon beach family independence day thing. I was unhappy. My dad made remarks about me looking unhappy again. I didn't want to spend more time with them nor the beach family. I went to Oleg's party. I found it refreshing in a sense that he knows a lot of Russian people. And at some point the 4 of us hanging out on the balcony were all from Belarus. That was cool. But that too, got old after a few hours. I felt a wave of "Do something!!!!" coming on. I asked around if anyone had a coin I could flip. Everyone just said no without really engaging. Not my crowd. So I just left. I hauled my ass to Pacific Palisades High School for their fireworks. It's been the only consistently good place for me to go to see a fireworks show. Everything else has been disappointing. And I made it. I parked a mile away so I wouldn't have to deal with cars again. Out of the last 2 times I was there, once I got hit by another car and the other I got stuck in traffic trying to make a right for over an hour. This time I just ran a mile back to my car and was home 20 minutes later.
Those are the facts. I don't have time to get into my emotional state about any of this. Queue in behavioral therapy. Not digging into anything right now. I did things. They were fun. I was lonely. I will do more things. The end. Good night.
Thursday we got on a bus which took us to Las Vegas. Jake was my bus buddy. In Vegas we did a photo scavenger hunt. Then we stuck around for the "Open Bar" that turned out to only serve bad beer and bad wine. I have had it. I walked out. I went looking for tickets for a show but couldn't find anything. So I got a small bottle of Russian Water and drank it. I went back to the party that was now largely depleted and had another 4 glasses of wine. Then I had silly conversations with people and followed a group of coworkers to a club. I wore comfy clothes for a change. I may still be able to do flips and tricks in a collared shirt, but I can't jump well in my usual pants. So I wore my parkour pants. Well turned out they don't like what I was wearing at the fancy-pants club. I wasn't let in. I went back to the hotel room and drunk called the girl I've been dating. She said some unusual things that I was in no mental state to fully discuss, especially over the phone.
The next day I spent running around going to shows. Saw Tarzan the movie, Popovich the act, Recycled Percussion the musicians, Sin City comedy cabaret, and the cherry on top was the Absinthe performance, which was, you guessed it, amazing. Chris and Alina made it to Vegas that night and we concluded the day by going up the Stratosphere tower.
Almost forgot. I won in roulette. Made 2 bets of $3 and won $19. Then later bet $3 and won $39. Yeah. Good luck!
Anyway, the next day we walked around got food etc. I played roulette again, but with less luck this time. I lost $25. Then won $20. Then lost $40 and then lost $15. Overall, it's been negative, but ultimately fun. We went to two magic shows. We saw Mat Franco and Pen&Teller. Pen and Teller were amazing, just like I thought they would be. I wish we'd had the time to take photos with them. Alas, we needed to make the drive back.
I woke up at a normal time the next day despite everything. Sunday it was. I went to the beach. This time I spent a good amount of time there. I got water. Did things in moderation. Then... it was almost late. It was Heather's last day in LA. People were going to play board games at a bar and then go over to Colin C's place. I didn't want to go to the bar. I was getting sad, too. That happens, still for all the same reasons. So I went home and crashed.
I woke up around 20:30 and had this desire to go do something. I decided to have a conversation with the girl, but I wanted to have it in person. She lives far away so I suggested I come over. She said she sees why she'd say that because she's under the impression I don't want to come after. I was confused. But I did explain that yes, she's right, I did have plans for the 4th. But.... she told me to not bother and just spend time with other people. 0.o I didn't need more than that. I'm looking for a woman who will say "Fuck yes! Come over!". She wasn't the one and that was the end of that. Have to be honest, it bummed me out a little. Life goes on though. I signed up for speed dating and RSVP'd for board games at Colin's. He didn't reply that night. Well, that was disappointing.
I started today by wanting to make things different in any way that I could. I went on a hike. Did the Los Liones trail in 30 minutes again. Showered. Went for lunch with family. Washed my car. Told my family I wasn't coming to picnic/fireworks after. Decided to not go to the lagoon beach family independence day thing. I was unhappy. My dad made remarks about me looking unhappy again. I didn't want to spend more time with them nor the beach family. I went to Oleg's party. I found it refreshing in a sense that he knows a lot of Russian people. And at some point the 4 of us hanging out on the balcony were all from Belarus. That was cool. But that too, got old after a few hours. I felt a wave of "Do something!!!!" coming on. I asked around if anyone had a coin I could flip. Everyone just said no without really engaging. Not my crowd. So I just left. I hauled my ass to Pacific Palisades High School for their fireworks. It's been the only consistently good place for me to go to see a fireworks show. Everything else has been disappointing. And I made it. I parked a mile away so I wouldn't have to deal with cars again. Out of the last 2 times I was there, once I got hit by another car and the other I got stuck in traffic trying to make a right for over an hour. This time I just ran a mile back to my car and was home 20 minutes later.
Those are the facts. I don't have time to get into my emotional state about any of this. Queue in behavioral therapy. Not digging into anything right now. I did things. They were fun. I was lonely. I will do more things. The end. Good night.
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